IF…

If you can tell big porkies and keep a straight face
If you can be two faced and seem to have good grace
If you can wangle a big house and not get caught
If you can seem to be quite fair when you’ve been bought
If you can be at ease amid much torrid sleaze
And always find some way to do just as you please
And as you do it see all blame is never yours
And as you leave your friends and brothers with your chores
And as you take the glory that belongs to them
You will by then arrive at what you have become
You will by then be – a politician – my son

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